


Something like understanding.

by orphan_account



Series: The Understanding Type [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-19
Updated: 2014-11-19
Packaged: 2018-02-26 05:52:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2640461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Throat destroyed after Naginas attack, but still miraculously alive, Snape finds it hard to be bitter these days. Even if Potter is the only one who can understand him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something like understanding.

**Author's Note:**

> Pre-Slash, you know the drill. I want? at some point to do a few follow-up shorts to this piece.

"Are you sure you don’t want me to come with?"

"Ginny. Come on." 

Harry flinches at the tone, watches as the bushy haired woman gently leads their red headed friend away for a ‘chat’. Knows that this conversation will most likely end with Ginny in tears and Ron not talking to him for a week. At the same time he’s just glad that Hermione understands why he can't have either of them there. 

Some things are just meant to be done alone.

Snape had been cleared of all charges, and Harry was already in the process of pushing for the man to receive an order of Merlin. Thankfully Mungos seems to understand that the man still has enemies on both sides, and there are armed guards flanking the door to his hospital room despite his ‘free’ status.

The edge of silver dress robes skate against the ground and Harry has himself set in the way that Ron likes to tease makes him really look like the Chosen One. It’s an advantage Harry doesn’t mind pressing as it gets him past the front desk and into the room with only a few minutes of conversation and handing over his wand. It amuses him that they bother asking since he figures its common knowledge these days his wandless abilities. Not to mention it’s only his raw power that had kept Snape alive long enough to receive more nuanced medical care.

Quietly he follows a buxom mediwixen into the room, tilting his head in the direction of the muggle iv until she elaborates. Apparently they weren’t able to reconstruct the esophagus just yet, and until then they were just going to have to do things the old fashioned way. Carefully she peels back the blanket, and Harry is just glad that he manages not to gasp as the intricate layer of scarring is revealed.  The witch continues pulling it down, tucking it around the older man’s waist before beginning her scans. Harry watches with rapt attention, before flushing when he notices that Severus is no longer asleep but eyeing him with similiar curiosity.

"If I might be completely honest with you, Mister Potter, I’m actually glad we haven’t been able to do it yet. I finished Hogwarts your first year and quite frankly, I don’t want to know what kind of tongue lashings we’d be in for here if he could speak."

Harry wants to argue that the man in question is only mute- not deaf but something stops him. Maybe the fact that Snape might kill him for coming to his defense not once, but twice now, or the fact that he’s been on the receiving end of that acid tongue enough to understand. When she finally vacates the room with a quick, ‘now don’t wear out my patient too much, Mister Potter’, Harry drags the lone chair in the room to the bed side and makes quick work of grabbing the potion master’s hand.

That’s when the babbling begins and everything comes pouring out. The list of names. The ones who made it, the ones who didn’t- on both sides. What it was like at King’s Cross which isn’t something that he’s explained to anyone yet- not even Hermione, but it just feels right to tell Snape. Because if there is someone who will understand- it’s him. Understand how scared he was but so willing at the same time, to give up everything for a single cause.

Then the apologies. For the pensive incident, for his father’s behavior, for sirius, for not understanding until it was almost too late, for not being able to keep the incident from happening in the first place. He knows it’s ridiculous to apologize for other people’s actions but he feels so much lighter for having said it.

Harry can’t bare to look up, so instead he focuses on the contrast of their hands. Broad tanned thumb rubbing gently against pale piano fingers, occasionally flipping it over to massage at the palm. Amazed that Snape hasn’t snatched his hand away yet, concerned that maybe the man can’t- maybe he’s too weak and wishing Harry would just leave.

He apologizes for calling him a coward, tightening his grip on the man’s hand but can’t help but feel awkward so he finishes up with how he isn’t sorry for all the petty jibes about him being ugly. After all, Severus gave as good as he got in those regards. There’s something there, something tugging at his chest, and he drops the hand to trace at the marks along the man’s throat before admitting,

"You aren’t even that ugly you know. Not handsome by any means. But you don’t have to be handsome. You don’t have to be anything- anymore."

There’s a quirk of the eyebrow and it forces Harry to meet Snape’s eyes for the second time in the almost two hours that he’s now spent in the hospital room. A soft push against the back of his mind, and it’s only the familiar feeling that causes Harry to drop his defenses.

_Finally, Mr. Potter. I was wondering how long you would continue to treat me as a dead man._

"Wasn’t treating you like a dead man."

_Ah, a catholic priest then? Lay out all your sins and hope I’ll give you penance._

"It’s not that.. I just… you deserved to know that I am.. I am sorry. You don’t have to forgive me if you don’t want to."

_Far be it from me to shatter your notion of me as a petty unforgiving man, I find it rather hard to hold a grudge these days._

Harry is stuck between the urge to roll his eyes and nod his head in understanding. There’s nothing more he really knows to say and after a few moments he goes to stand, startled when suddenly his hand is taken. He stares at the weak grip for a moment before remembering that Snape can’t talk and can’t communicate at all if he doesn’t make eye contact- and so stealing himself for whatever biting remark there is left to be made, he raises his gaze.

_I’m sorry, that was a cheap shot. I'm… don’t leave. I find myself rather alone these days._

"You want me to stay?"

_If you have the time. I do understand that there are legions of adoring fans waiting for you but…_

"Don’t start with that. I’ll need to owl ‘Mione to let her know where I’m at lest she come charging through the door.  Would you like me to ask her to send anything?"

_A book or two. I am confident enough in Miss Grangers intellect that she’ll find something suitable._

"I’m going to pretend that wasn’t a dig at me and thank you for complimenting her, I’ll make sure to tell her that."

There’s a pause and then, “You have to let go of me so that I can send her a message…. “

There’s something there- and then Snape’s eyes are closing and he drops his weak grasp on Harry.

"I’ll come back, I promise."

Snape’s eyes flicker open briefly,  _See that you do._


End file.
